Back to

Feeling more alive

Increased well-being and self-confidence

Enhanced healing power

Social sex, solo sex, and spiritual sex

We owe it to ourselves to acknowledge, objectively, the beneficial effects of raising our energy through sexual awakening, because the list is astounding. Here we go...

Feeling more alive

People will pay money -- or do almost anything -- to feel more alive: jump out of airplanes, perform on stage, jog, swim in the ocean. And sex, of course, belongs high on that list. Truly, this is a big favor that the inner animal can do for us: help us feel -- and in fact BE -- more alive.

There's no doubt that sexual energy, running through the body, lights it up like a Christmas tree. The boost in radiance can be so powerful, people notice it immediately...

Higher energy improves ALL of our functions

All our senses rise and fall according to the energy level in our bodies. Therefore, higher energy makes all of our senses keener, and enhances the functionality of all our functions.

Achieving purity and radiance through sex

And there's nothing quite like sex -- sex in a good spirit, at least, and of real intensity -- to slow down the runaway mind, to wash away cares, and to make a complicated person simple, clean, and pure. More like a virgin. Peace!

Not all sex is created equal

But of course, not all sex is created anywhere NEAR equal. Mediocre sex -- quickie sex, sex for release, sex for modest consolation, or just plain lousy sex -- has little or no uplifting effect, little afterglow. No significant benefit.

It takes steady heating, applied OVER TIME, to warm up a cold room. The human body can be a big, cold room. If our sexual heater is turned on, set to a high temperature, and kept running for a while, the residual energy (afterglow) will almost certainly EXCEED the starting energy level -- leaving us brighter, more alive, and more conscious.

Good questions:





I believe that sex is base, and dirty.
see answer

When I have sex, I end up mellow and relaxed, but NOT radiant. Why not?
see answer

Sexual aliveness feels dangerous. When I feel sexual, I'm inclined to jump someone!
see answer

What about the danger of sex addiction in a sex-based relationship?
see answer

Increased well-being and self confidence

Naturally, when we feel low-energy, flat, or dead inside, we suffer a severely diminished feeling of well-being.

And the reverse is true: When we feel vibrant and alive, we feel self-confident. We feel more attractive, because we KNOW that people appreciate energy and aliveness. And we feel CAPABLE:

Surely, the on-top-of-the-world feeling that results from heightened energy numbers among the greatest joys of living.

Good questions:


It's great being around a confident person, but it's a
drag to be around someone who's smug or conceited.
see answer

Enhanced healing power

Haven't you heard people say, "She's/he's got GOOD hands." Energy flows from the hands of a person who is vibrantly alive, and that touch feels delicious to others. And in lovemaking -- particularly in the heightened vibrancy and vitality that accompanies true passion -- people may have positively electric bodies, and supercharged touch. Add to the natural benefits of an energetic touch a LOVING/HEALING INTENTION, and you have a very healing touch.

Everyone loves -- and NEEDS -- energy and aliveness. But in order to give energy to others, we've got to have plenty of it ourselves. Sex play can provide that superabundance of juice.

And, we absolutely don't need physical touch to share energy. Energy radiates. If we're radiant with higher energy, people feel it and are uplifted by it regardless. So, the residual energy in the aftermath of sex, or in a sexually alive person, creates a healing/uplifting effect WITH or WITHOUT the laying on of hands.

How vital and human powers hook up to Higher Power

The sacred sex function makes a fine energy-generating station. And the heightened energy and aliveness awakened in sex play has an even greater potential for healing than what a human with "good hands" could provide. Higher energy allows us to make a spiritual connection to God's love and energy, and to channel THAT. And THAT is far more healing than any exclusively human power could be. Here is how it works:

Through cultivating our sexual passion, we can raise the energy and sensitivity in ourselves. When they get high enough, our energy and sensitivity awaken us to consciousness of God all around. And, that living awareness of God's presence connects us to the higher power of His love. Once we are connected to it, God's love can flow THROUGH us to those God loves -- everyone!

Good question:


How can people be trusted not to exploit their sexual
energy and radiance for their own selfish purposes?
It seems a little like letting a child play with a gun.
see answer

Social sex, solo sex, and spiritual sex

A lot of people, intuiting the power of sex, legitimately wonder, "How am I gonna get this wonderful, uplifting sex happening? I don't have anybody..."

Obviously, not everybody has a relationship that includes sex. And furthermore, even those who are coupled may not have a relationship that supports MUCH sex -- or that supports really GOOD sex, energizing and uplifting sex. It's a matter of the sexual potential and sexual self-mastery of any given individual. Those things may not be simple, easy, or quick to change.

So it's time now to think a little outside of the conventional box. A lot of people know they can have better sex by themselves than they have with their present partner -- or with any partner. Whoa! THAT may be a controversial fact, but it is still the truth -- and everybody RECOGNIZES it. And, despite the taboos and shame in this area, solo sex may not be inappropriate, unwise, or even un-spiritual!

Spirituality and sex: a match made in heaven

Consider these writings from people who were, (a) unmarried, (b) not promiscuous, and (c) saints.

Some people may fault us for reading these poems too literally, rather than as poetic imagery. Possibly, they might consider us superficial, or even unspiritual, on that account. We would argue that it is twisting the truth to turn something relatively straightforward into mere allegory. We feel that de-sexualizing the saints is more a matter of preference than fact.

A large body of testimony and experience, from people all over the world, suggests that mystic experience frequently includes experiences of an entirely, unabashedly SEXUAL nature. This evidence shows that often, sexual awakening and spiritual awakening are often SIMULTANEOUS.

"I sat down to meditate, determined to see God. After a long time passed and God had not appeared, I was almost ready to stop. Then, to my surprise, something stirred in me, and what stirred was below the belt. And so, I touched myself, which made no sense to me -- and then, like the most incredible thing, God took me in. I disappeared entirely. There was no I, there was nothing. When I returned, I was completely reborn. Everything was suspended in light, like jewels. I could see right THROUGH all material things into the perfect space of Godlight."

We are fully satisfied that God, Him or Herself, can be VERY sexy -- insofar as God frequently makes wondrous use of sexuality as part of the larger process of mystical experience. It is in that spirit that we take this poem from Saint Teresa of Avila:

Perhaps people would be wise to completely rethink this matter of sex -- INCLUDING sex outside the context of partnership. When we do, let's think about it not in terms of self-degradation and something that's going to make us blind and stunt our growth, but rather, as a genuine, potent, valid, God-approved spiritual aid. In that light, consider this beautiful love poem to God:

Transforming conventional sex to sacred sex

Once we manage to get past our own personal and cultural prejudices, we encounter another very real problem: habit. The conventional use of sex, solo or social, is useless, or less than useless, for upliftment. Quickie sexual encounters amount to little or nothing -- or even LESS than nothing, since they are so depressing to the spirit. Most of the time, masturbation is no better: It is something people do, not to create or enjoy higher energy, but primarily for energy release.

Sex for the primary purpose of release from energy is the exact opposite of what higher sex, be it solo or social, is all about. For sacred sex, we're going to have to change those habits, and take a whole different approach.

Getting on and staying on

In sex jargon, we hear the expression GETTING IT ON -- "we're going to get it on." And when referring to orgasm, people use the expression, "getting off."

Ordinary sex expresses a desire to enjoy intense but fleeting pleasure, and then to end that very pleasure with a desire for energy release and relief. The result? A little flash of aliveness, gone as fast as a splash of water on a hot skillet. Sacred sex aims to get on, and NOT get off. In this difference of intention, you see the exact and profound difference between the ordinary and sacred uses of sex. One way is to be relieved of desire; the other is to fan desire into a mighty fire and burn it to infinity, transcending ego itself.

In the sacred use of sex, the goal is to create energy not for fleeting pleasure, and certainly not for "relief" from energy itself -- but rather to have energy, to live with energy, to continue as energy, always. The most beneficial use of sex is to use it for getting on, and STAYING on, that higher plane of energy, vibrancy -- and yes, higher pleasure -- as God would have it be. You don't WANT to get off -- you just want to stay on.

The essential thrust of desire is to become infinity -- to GO to infinity, REACH to infinity, and LIVE in infinity. To become TRULY alive, and stay perpetually alive like a mighty oak tree. Long live your aliveness!

Many people may be thinking, "What are you saying here, exactly? Are you telling us that if we want to engage in sacred sex, we are never to be satisfied or gratified? Does it mean we can never get off?"

That's an excellent question! Orgasm or no orgasm is NOT the crucial issue here, not the maker or breaker of sacred sex. The important thing is one's tolerance for higher energy IN GENERAL. We will explain more about that in a minute. But first, since you brought it up, let's deal with orgasm directly.

Everyone recognizes, honestly, that all human beings do have certain fairly small limits in their tolerance for desiring. Blowing off extra energy now and then is nothing to be terribly ashamed of. The natural dance step of life is two steps forward and one step back. Jog, eat cookies! Jog, eat cookies! No blame, shame, or guilt should be associated with that normal pattern.

But we can also honestly admit that the higher a person's "towards" force or desiring force, the happier the person will be, and the stronger his or her connection to a lover, to all others, and to God Himself. Do you want to be happy, connected, and full of desire, or not? Of course you do! But more precisely, what percentage of the time would you like to enjoy that magnetism? It's up to individuals to determine, by the way they handle desire and energy, what level of connection they actually want to enjoy as their PREPONDERANT mode of living and relating.

Again, this is not all about orgasm or no orgasm. The craving for orgasmic release is just a symptom of a larger tendency to wish to avoid higher energy, or to confine energy to lower levels. If we keep the body on the sexual burner long enough, residual energy will exist even IF we have orgasm in the end. Therefore, the most essential factors are:

1. How much intensity will we enjoy/tolerate? And...

2. For HOW LONG will we let that higher energy work in us, and through us?

The two most essential factors in effective energy raising

Unquestionably, for best results sacred sex requires greater-than-usual tolerance of energy. In fact, the achievement of higher levels of well-being always requires a measure of healthy self-discipline. For example, wisdom at Thanksgiving means making sure you don't eat too much, so you can still walk around and feel like a human being after the feast!

Many people think they just love energy, the more the merrier. But pay attention to their handling of intensity in sex, and you may notice these common anti-intensity patterns at work:

In real life, if and when the energy actually DOES rise to the point where it could be uplifting and energizing, many people, being unused to handling that level of intensity, are liable to "freak out."

Fortunately, for this move into a more sacred practice of sex, normal patterns don't need to be TOTALLY changed all at once. Habit can be upgraded progressively to very good effect. Perfection isn't required. Better IS better. Just as better health is preferable to worse health, MORE energy is better than LESS.

Improvement in areas of ingrained habit can take time. But it need not take too much time. You may not WANT to take a lot of precious time getting where you want to go. If you wish to move ahead at a speed that will satisfy your own heartfelt desire for progress, bring maximum consciousness to the dance of your life. Watching each of your steps, notice where they carry you. Adjust as needed. Take as many steps forward as possible, and take as few as possible backwards.

You will find, as you attempt this, that there are a variety of factors involved in the mastery of sacred sex -- some of them social, most of them internal. A discussion of those factors is beyond the scope of this article. For now, simply use this rule of thumb: WHATEVER effectively limits the intensity or duration of sexual energy-raising may also, at least in certain respects, limit its spiritual usefulness. People who wish to discover the value of sacred sex must find in themselves the diligence needed to locate and overcome the particular impediments that exist in their own case.

Good questions:




I believe that masturbation is sinful.
see answer

I don't want to have sex alone.
see answer

Being sexually alive -- I mean, horny -- makes me edgy and uncomfortable.
see answer

Read Part 2: Higher Consciousness
E-mail this article to a friend

Use this area to leave feedback on the article you've just read

Using the Inner Dog: Raised Energy

Direct E-mail

Request for support

Use the spaces below to submit feedback directly to LLF via e-mail. You can write as much as you like in the comments area.

When you are done, click the "Send Feedback" button.

If you appreciate what we're doing, we would appreciate your support

We work hard, every single day of our lives, to do what we do, to delve as deep as we do, to put it out as far as we do, to do it to the high standards that we always seek to meet. There is so much more we would do, if we had the resources to do it.

We know that you appreciate what we're doing. We've received thanks from many of you. When we appreciate anything that much, we WANT to support it. That's how we live. We give from our pockets as well as from our hearts.

We ask you to consider whether you would want to do the same for us.

To support this work, click here.



E-mail address

Home | Site Map


Sex CAN be dirty, but the question is, MUST it be? Can you see the possibility that sex can also be both beautiful and spiritually beneficial as well?

Sex is what one makes of it: We have seen Segovia play the most sublime music on the guitar, and we have also seen a guitar used as a club to destroy a drum set. But obviously, before you can use sex in a spiritually useful way, you must get past your rigid negative beliefs.

If you wish to experience the positive potentials of sex, talk to God. Ask God to help you see beyond the small-minded ideas of common culture, and move beyond your own past limitations as well. Look into your own heart, and try to get in touch with what you intuitively know about the potential BEAUTY of sex.

Then, commit yourself to playing the music of love in a higher key. That way, sex won't be base and dirty for YOU -- it will be beautiful, as God intends!


We said earlier that sex CAN leave us with a lasting residual boost of higher energy. But the search for fast energy "relief" -- a common goal of both habitual masturbation and lackluster sex -- INTENTIONALLY has the exact opposite effect: to release MORE energy than it creates.

Further, sex is a complex process, depending on many factors. Sexual energy may not always be sufficient to energize an individual. Until you can line up your being in such a way as to support higher passion, sex may energize you little more than modest physical exercise. Far more uplifting experiences may be possible for you, but to determine that, deeper investigations may be required.

TIP: Whatever you do with sex, if you want the most out of it, try to end up with a positive balance in your energy bank account. Learn to make MORE energy than you spend. But success at that may require commitment over time.


Needless to say, higher energy can tempt us to engage in socially insensitive behavior -- out of unbridled lust! And hey -- not everyone will object to such attacks. Some will say, "Bring it on!" The THRILLING effects of WELCOME, spontaneous sexual overtures are undeniable -- but so are the CHILLING effects of UNWANTED advances. Socially insensitive behavior -- going against the will of another -- is obviously problematical, no matter how enthusiastic YOU happen to be.

TIP: A little self-discipline, combined with your best shot at social sensitivity, goes a long way to avoiding this pitfall -- or at least minimizing it (no one's perfect, right?).

Energy must be well-controlled to be beneficially used. Energized people need to appropriately manage their bounteous power so as not to be WAY too much for others (like laughing WAY too loud; or jumping for joy on someone else's FOOT!). When you have a lot more energy than you are used to, it takes a little time to learn how to handle it, instead of just throwing it around because you can't -- or perhaps won't -- control it.

TIP: Energy is power, and with power comes responsibility. Use it WELL, or lose it. Ultimately, the only way to STAY at higher levels is to achieve self-control in those levels. Consider it healthy self-discipline, because it is.


Without a doubt, couples who build intimacy PRIMARILY on sex are in trouble. As a foundation, sex is unreliable and weak. In any healthy relationship, the EXTENT and the NATURE of dependence on sex needs to be consciously controlled, and kept in perspective.

But is it surprising that piles of gold tend to bring out greed in us? Any pleasure in life can be used addictively. Even meditation can become an addiction. Sex is no exception. We easily become hooked on the pleasures another person provides us by stroking both body and ego. And sexual partners can participate with us in ways that collusively "help us" reduce the "discomfort" associated with extra energy and consciousness. By magnifying both of these "advantages," higher desire can exacerbate any tendencies toward sexually addictive patterns.

On the other hand: must we live as paupers to avoid the pitfall of becoming greedy? Running away is only caving in to the problem -- and postponing the real challenge of SOLVING it. Unless for some reason, success seems impossible for now, it may be better to strive on towards victory than to avoid the fray altogether. Each of us, mated or not, must master our inner dog to make him (or her) socially appropriate. As long as we do that, the regular, right use of sex can become a very HEALTHY habit -- much like jogging, or meditation.


When we feel particularly energetic and confident, there's always a danger of becoming smug or vain. That is irritating to others, but it can hurt us WORSE -- with spiritual errors such as coasting, laziness, righteousness, etc. Avoiding smugness takes vigilance, but it's easy to do when you remember that you don't have a patent on this beautiful sexual energy. It is truly God's gift, and He gave it to ALL of mankind. Moreover, He gave it to us, not to make us lazy and righteous, but so that we could have more joy in life, and bring joy to others.


Our aim here is to put roses, NOT guns, in the hands of God's children. Children make mistakes, no doubt -- we ALL do. In order to get things right, we need to be taught. A little education can help people grow up straight and true. To that end, here is a bit of sex education that is uncommon in being neither superficial nor spiritually misleading.

Sex and giving

Sexual energy is ours to have, but it also has another function: to SHARE. This is God's plan for the passionate aspect of life, even though sexuality is not generally used by people that way. More commonly, when people generate sexual energy -- alone or with another person -- they simply "eat the profits." That is, they simply indulge in the treasure they have found, and try to consume every bit of it -- like a dog that runs into the bushes with his bone, and gnaws it all by himself in private, or buries it so no one else can have it.

There is a natural temptation to use the attractiveness of radiance for primarily selfish reasons -- thus spending God's gift for selfish acquisitions. To avoid this pitfall, keep this in mind: Certainly, your EGO is not God's gift to mankind -- but your energy may very well be. As a matter of fact, radiant energy IS God's gift to mankind. All that's needed to make it the Divine gift it was intended to be, is to use energy for GOOD purposes -- to share it with LOVE.

Higher healing becomes possible if we don't let the inner dog run away with the bone. Instead, we use privacy to generate passion, but then run right out and share the resulting energy with OTHERS. Thus, we see the USE of what is PRIVATE for the good of the PUBLIC -- for effective spiritual SERVICE to the public.


Then you have to get over that belief before solo sex can be spiritually useful to you.


Perhaps it is difficult for you to face the conditions of your life with respect to companionship. That is understandable, but it might help to do so. Perhaps sex can actually help you face these things.

Sex may also be able to help you escape your sense of aloneness on a deeper level. Did you read the poems of those mystics? They probably did not, in the main, have human sex partners, and yet, do you think they EVER had sex ALONE? Not as they saw it.

ALONE is primarily a state of mind. ALONE suggests not just a lack of companionship, but a lack of spiritual connection as well. A primary PURPOSE and VALUE of sacred sex is to achieve a state of connectedness in which we no longer experience ourselves as being alone -- to REALIZE the spiritual reality of togetherness.

In spiritual sex, be it solo or social, connection IS. The spirit can hardly recognize the possibility of being alone. Testimony from people who engage in this practice suggests that they feel much LESS alone in their "solo" sex practice than do most who share their bed with another body. THAT is a profound spiritual improvement, don't you think?

Also, you might wish to try the Unification technique as described on our site. It may help you transcend the feeling of aloneness.


We may react to increased aliveness by feeling antsy. To correct that perceived problem, we may even react AGAINST the aliveness itself. This is a natural reaction, obviously, so it is good to deal straightforwardly with it.

Higher energy takes some getting used to, even on a purely physical level. People who are unused to exercise may feel ill, and even vomit after an unusually intense workout. The same is true on the emotional level. People who feel "too good, too happy" may indulge in negative habits, or even pitch a fit, in a conscious or subconscious attempt to return to their familiar "comfort zone." Orgasmic release, negative thinking, toxicity (as in a hangover) are all common and effective ways to douse higher energy.

But in the long run, we will never get used to higher energy if we don't want to. The fact is, discomfort with higher-than-usual aliveness is PRIMARILY a mind thing -- a matter of opinion. The more yecchy we THINK spinach tastes, the yecchier it seems to taste -- if we even let it past our lips! Releasing our negative opinion of spinach lets us taste spinach with an open mind. Then maybe we will discover it's good tasting, AND good for us! So it is with higher energy. We need to adjust our attitude toward it, before we will adapt our bodies to it.

TIP: Once you decide you want more energy, it's time to start getting used to it! In order to get used to it, you have to keep it awhile, don't you?