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The Gift of Yourself

Living at the Speed of Life

by David Truman

Many of us believe that we are products of our past, and that belief creates significant limitations on what we think we can do and be and feel. But actually, we are ALWAYS free to be, to love, to live. We are not limited by our past. That's the message of this article: Delivering on the promise that you are is about NOT being a product of experience or a slave to the past, but rather, being the person that you ARE. Enjoy this most liberating read...

Repeating the past sixty-five years later

Repeating the past one day later

Your present power to limit yourself

You are the sunshine of your life

The detour of self-irrelevance

Back on track

Living in your absence

Living is the direct dispensation of you. It is literal living -- living which has no wait state, no deliberation, interruption, manipulation, suppression, or intercession. Allowing yourself to be, to be revealed as you are, in your naked splendor. Such is your stewardship of God's most precious jewels: yourself.

Now, people claim that they cannot be free, because they are limited by the past. But you see, that is untrue. The past can't last; it is dead and gone.

There's no meaning to the fact that "when I was nine I did this or that, or had this or that experience." For sure, it's not happening now, and it can't happen again. And indeed, recreating the past is impossible. For example . . .

Repeating the past sixty-five years later

A couple in their eighties remember fondly the night they met, sixty-five years ago, at a high school prom. That night, they danced cheek to cheek.

So they decide, "Let's repeat that event." They put up the balloons, put on a song, and dance cheek to cheek. But, you know, when they try to hold each other tight, they get this crinkling sound -- the sound of their plastic diapers. And this, along with a few other details, makes the reenactment different than the original experience. A dead giveaway that this is not the past.

Repeating the past one day later

A young and enthusiastic couple makes fantastic love on Monday. They're so excited about what happened, they decide to repeat it on Tuesday -- the very next day. But it turns out different. First of all, they have an expectation which, of course, is daunting. And an apprehension that they won't be able to repeat it, which turns them off. The bottom line: to repeat Monday on Tuesday is impossible.

This is the kind of thing that happens. Even the slightest change of mind, of circumstance, will easily make the repetition of the past quite impossible.

Your present power to limit yourself

The past is gone, and irretrievable. What exists and persists now is you. You can reenact the past, and thereby try to bring it to the present moment. But obviously, what results is only a present dramatization, not the past itself.

Thus you come to realize that your past can't be your present reality, and nor can it affect you now. You can only sit there and think how profoundly it does affect you. And you can think that, now, you're absolutely limited by it. And you can repeat those notions over and over.

Self-hypnosis is a reality, but what it conjures is not. Many real magicians exist. Masters of illusion, all.

It's not true that you are limited by the past, but the playing of any idea in the present has an effect. Because in present time, you have lots of power. For example, if right now you think about something depressing from the past, then you will be depressed by that thought now. And if you decide in present time that your past limits you, then in present time, you are limiting yourself.

But you see, it is not that the past is limiting you; it is that you, presently, are trying to limit yourself. Or rather, you are creating make-believe limitations behind which you can hide, limitations that excuse you from doing what your soul, if left to its own devices, would oblige you do, and want you to do, now.

That's because you can, as one possible expression of your freedom, believe that you are limited -- an attractive possibility for anyone who feels a need for an excuse with which to escape an obligation. You know how hard it is to escape legitimate obligations without a proper (acceptable) excuse.

IF (and only if) I am sick,
THEN I can (legitimately) stay home from school.

So, thinking that you are limited by the past may seem like a most useful fantasy, a way to get out of whatever you don't feel "up to." How? Presumably, it is . . .

. . . "due to"

"The Past" which so

"forcibly"

"impresses Itself"

upon NOW

as to render NOW unlivable.

Creatively.

"Officially."

"Legitimately."

so.

Behind the past, we hide. But, we live now -- occasionally. We live in those moments in which we allow ourselves to appear without the past. So you might go through a decade or two where you're plenty busy, but severely encumbered by the past. For the most part, during those particular decades, you're just not yourself.

But . . .

into every life, a little sun must fall.

You are the sunshine of your life

One day, having let your guard down, you experience something Real. At such a moment, you get a strange feeling of déjà vu: you remind you of you. "Oh yes. I've seen this person before. In fact, I've been this person before. This is me! I'm back! How wonderful!"

And you wonder, "Whoa! Where have I been? What's happened?"

The detour of self-irrelevance

You've been on this distraction, this side road, this detour:

"I"

"am"

"forced"

down the road of self-irrelevance by the

"unmerciful"

"hand" of

"The Past."

One goes down that

"road."

Back on track

Your little detour from you could take most, if not all, of your years. But then,

"Time"

"permitting"

you come back to the main road, and say, "Oh -- I remember what I was doing."

Living in your absence

You can forget the detour, the filler parts. They weren't particularly memorable anyway -- trying to live in your absence. So, cut out the parts where you were . . .

"living"

in

"The Past."

Saying/thinking/insisting/pretending "I'm in the past."

Good riddance to that. Good riddance to the part where you weren't there, just marking time, awaiting your return so that something real could happen again.

Of course, if you are "in the past," then you are not here now. If you are "in the past," you don't exist, because the past isn't here now. This is how addicts of the past can have long periods in which, for all practical purposes, they don't exist. At least, they certainly don't live.

So much waste in the making of all films, except cinema verité. When you look at the movie of your life, you see there's a lot of filler. The parts in between times when you're being yourself are actually, essentially, throw-away material. No particular significance.

So, editing the film of your life, be merciful, and cut out the boring parts, the parts where you were not yourself, leaving the parts where you were. Were there. Were involved. "I was me once in 1980 -- for five minutes. And then again, for two minutes, I was me 1991." Those moments form the basis for a solid and memorable seven-minute documentary of the parts of your life in which you lived, participated. A short, you know. But nice. Good stuff.

Cheer up! A good short could serve as useful filler in between feature films of people who lived a great deal. A bathroom break, possibly?

But the point is, you can always be you -- if you wanted to. You can be you any time you want. So you don't have to throw most of your future moments away, you see. You could take this precious resource that's you, and be it. Live as it. In which case,

potentially,

theoretically,

and in fact

you could have significant moments all the time. Again -- if you wanted to.

This is big, you see. This "possibility" is what life is for. It's what you'd call important. Because it's very good, what you are.

The essence of your purpose is to live as the Divine Reality of your existence -- the living/being of you. You, participating as you, who you are.

Here.

Now.

Being.

Doing.

As is.

No waiting.


by David Truman

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